sorry, i love u

10 more minutes and it will be a new day
A new day but the same day The same people, the same self
The same dashed hopes, the same let down right after the other, the same inadequacies, the same life, the same lovelessness, the same longing, 'n utter desire, despair for something real, for something right
The same longing for you.
But in 10 more minutes it will have been 5 months 7 days Exactly 6 months since I said it 4 months since I give you a sign
A thousand years since I've been waiting for you to tell me something back
An eternity until I will ever find you. You're not going to take me are you? Only 7 minutes left You said a few months.
A few weeks to figure it out 7 minutes, and it will have been three. But if you don't know by now, I don't believe you could want it Because you don't I don't want to start crying.
No, not yet There are still 6 minutes left Why? Why don't I want to start to cry yet 6 minutes will not change what weeks could not I'll still be sitting in the corner of my bedroom, on the floor...
The drafty windows will still be letting in the cold air. The phone will still stay silent. I will still be alone. And you will be missing I will still be wanting you Without you wanting me back. I wish I could go back Back to when you liked me Back to when I was good enough. Now somehow I'm not. I don't understand. Have I really changed? Or did you just start to see the real me? Did you leave when you found out too much? You left You left when you realized I wasn't right Just like everyone does. And I can't understand it I can't understand why no one ever wants to stay around me Why is it that they never want to hold on for that long What am I doing wrong Really.
Tell me. I can't take this anymore Just tell me why I only have things for the time it takes for me to realize I love them? Just tell me why you don't think I'm good enough anymore You're the only person I believe. You're the only friend who hasn't lied to my face You're the only one that makes me feel special when you tell me I am You're the only one I trust So when you don't think I'm good enough, it hurts It really hurts And I just want to know why Why can't I ever be good enough 5 more minutes. You aren't going to change your mind in 5 minutes, are you? No. You won't But you would never tell me that Because you don't want to hurt me Which is why I love you And why it hurts me even more The fact that you care and I know that you care but you still don't want to have me I'm sorry I'm sorry for not knowing you liked me last year And for hurting you I'm sorry Not because I think if that hadn't happened, I wouldn't be hurting now But because I care about you I love you And I always end up hurting the people I love I'm sorry I love you
Time 12:01
1 minute passed I'm sorry

It's hopeless ...